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Art, Creativity, Short Stories, Uncategorized

Short Story #3

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“Back off! Seriously back off!” I backed up towards….a window! ‘Great, I’m on the second floor. ‘ “BACK OFF!” I couldn’t see it anymore, but I could feel its presence. I felt around myself; looking for anything to defend myself. Anything. “Anything.” My foot slipped on something behind me. I knew that tonight was over. It felt like I watched my body fall into the abyss. Whack! My head made contact and then darkness.

…

‘Oh my head. Pain. Headache. PAIN!’ Then remembering what had happened last night I flashed my eyes open, but instantly regretted that action. Light flooded me. Everything was white. Instead of suffering in the complete emulousness I closed my eyes and attempted to hone in on my other senses. I heard nothing except my heart pounding. At least I knew I was alive. My nose worked, but I wish it didn’t. Whatever the smell was, it must have died. Could I move? I could. My body felt lifeless. My arms lifted easily; I could also wiggle my toes. ‘Okay. Let’s try this again.’ I opened my eyes once again. Light engulfed me. I slowly sat up, and there I sat in a glowing white space. The light bounced around. ‘Was this really where I was last night?’ I was still in a corner, but there was no window. I was still in my clothes from last night. I had the stamp on my wrist from the club last night. But how should I put this…my body was shimmering. Glimmering? Glistening? Whichever it was, it didn’t seem normal.

“Do you understand what is happening?”

‘Where did that voice come from?’ I jumped into a squatted position and tucked myself farther into the corner. “Who said that?” Silence. “Where are you?” Nothing. “Show yourself!?!” ‘Did I really want it to show itself. Was it the same person from last night?’ But if it wanted to fight, I was not going to back down. I threw my hands up into a fighting stance.

“No need for that. Alexandra relax yourself. I’m here to help you transition.” Again just a voice.

“If you are here to help, then show yourself!” ‘Transition?’ “What do you mean transition?”

A blazing being became more focused; they seemed to ooze from the white walls around me. “I’m here to help you transition. If you have any things you wish to bring to a close before your own close, I will help you find closure. Can you think of anything?”

‘Why do they keep saying transition? Bring to a close? My own close? Closure?’ “What are you talking about. I’m fine. I’m moving. I don’t need your help. I’m going back home.” I stood and tried to walk out of the endless room, but the blazing being stopped me. Seriously, my body stopped when the being’s glow moved in my way. “MOVE!”

“Alexandra. You need to keep your composure. I will explain everything in a moment. Can you keep calm?”

I wanted to strangle the glowing being, but sure I can be composed. Only for a moment. “Fine. Sure, Whatever.” I waited…

Suddenly the room that was once bright was full of darkness. I couldn’t see anything. But slowly my eyes accustomed themselves to the darkness. It was the room. It was filthy here. I didn’t notice last night but the floor was shrouded with trash. The wallpaper was torn and jagged. The only reason I could see anything at all, was because the blazing being was still besides me. Its glow was still vibrant amongst the darkness. I saw the window. It had bars on the outside; good thing I didn’t try that last night. I walked towards the window, but then I stumbled. ‘What was that? I pushed myself up, but it was not the floor that my hand pushed on…what am I touching?’ I jumped back! I know I touched something strange. It didn’t stay firm with my hand; it moved beneath me. “Wh…what was that? Show me.”

The being glided to the mass I was next to, until it was hovering next to the….body.

There was a body next to me. A lifeless body. ‘A BODY!’ I felt sick. I had used this body to brace myself. I felt disgusting. ‘Wait. A body.’ I crawled over to the body and checked their pulse. Maybe there was a chance they could be saved. Nothing. I took up the position to begin chest compressions…

“No need for that. Sadly this young woman is gone from this world.”

I got an eerie feeling. ‘Woman? No…’ I didn’t want to but I couldn’t look away. She had a pink top on like me. ‘Just a coincidence.’ She wore a blue jean skirt. ‘Normal for girls to have the same sense in fashion.’ The tiger stamp was also on her wrist. ‘Other people go to clubs. That’s normal.’ But…her face. Her face was my face. ‘My face. This was me. I was lifeless here in the dark alone.’ “How? Why? How?”

“Alexandra,” the glowing being came closer, “I need you to calm yourself.”

I couldn’t I was all sorts of feelings. Disbelief, anger, sadness, chills, confusion, depression. But that didn’t change anything. I needed to calm myself. ‘Just breathe Alex, breathe.’ But my body was not listening. It was shaking, and I don’t think it was going to stop.

“Alexandra. Alex….”

Suddenly arms wrapped me. Somebody was holding me. My body was relaxing. I wanted to look and see who was holding me, but instead I just hugged them harder. I wanted to just stay like this; because then that meant I didn’t have to deal with the problem at hand. But this smell…I knew this smell. It was coming from the person holding me. Looking up, there stood… Jeremiah!?! ‘WHAT!?! Jeremiah. My best friend who passed two years ago. How?’ I pushed him off of me and away. “Who are you?”

“It’s only been two years and you have forgotten me already, Alex?” Jeremiah smiled.

‘That grin. That was the grin that I have missed. How was it him? How was he here?’ Oh, how I have missed him. “Of course I remember you, Jeremiah. I miss you everyday,” my under control body was beginning to tremble again. Tears were forming. “Why are you here now? Where is here? Why did you have to leave me when I needed you most. Why..?” The floodgates opened.

Again Jeremiah hugged the sobbing Alex before him. “Oh, Alex. I’m sorry. It wasn’t my decision to leave either. If I could have stayed, I would have stay with you always. But God had a different plan. Now that I’m thinking about it; I probably needed to be here for you when you needed to transition. He knew that you would have no one. So for once I’m glad that I left this world two years ago. Even though watching you these last two years has been rough. I’ve tried to keep you safe. But some of your decisions have been terrible. Like the one last night. Why did you decide to go off with that scum? You knew that he was bad; why would you do that to yourself?”

I was listening, between my sobs, but I didn’t want to. I just wanted comfort, but all I was getting was a lesson. I knew that guy was bad news. I had planned to expose him, but instead I was cornered. I was killed. ‘Why me?’

“Alex. I’m sorry. Please stop crying. Please,” Jeremiah decided to let the lesson go. The results of her actions was not going to change. “Shhhhh…”

I’ve missed Jeremiah, so much. Life has been so empty without him. I’ve been just going through the motions. Jeremiah had been my only family left. Everyone else had already passed away when I was little. But for these last two years I’ve been reckless. I guess I’ve been trying to leave; ironic. Now that I’ve left; I desperately want to go back.

There are so many things that I haven’t done. Love, kids, life. Looking back I don’t think I would have actually achieved those things. Love: you have to first love yourself; and I don’t think I hated myself, but I was not happy. Kids: you need love first; maybe I should have adopted. I should have adopted! I could have given a different child a home and family. How I wish that could have been me. Life…my life was over. I wonder if I was able to continue, if I could have changed my life path. Now that I know what I know now, I would have tried.

“Jeremiah. What happens now?” Instead of looking at what could have been; I should just start fresh now.

Jeremiah still held Alex close. “Now you transition. God has given you the chance to give yourself closure or to give your chance to another person alive today. After that we go on. You live once again; just in a new way. A better way.” Jeremiah pulled away from Alex, “You ready?”

‘Was I ready? What else could I do?’ “I’m ready. And I know just what I want to do.”

…Down On Earth…

“Sister Mary? Do you know an Alexandra Mitchell?”

“No. I don’t believe I do,” Sister Lucy came over to look at the card. “Whomever she is, she is a God send. Look at this donation. With this, we can help so many of our kids.”

Sister Mary looked out at the kids running around outside, “You have a special guardian angel watching over you all. She has given you a chance at a better life. Bless you, Miss Alexandra.”

The End

Art, Creativity, Short Stories, Uncategorized

Short Story #2

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July 16, 2018

“I’m pregnant!” I told my fiancé excitedly. We were already getting married. ‘Yes, when I saw the positive I was slightly disappointed in myself because I didn’t wait; but that went away when I realized I was going to be a mom.’

Silence. All I got was silence.

“Did you hear me? We are going to have a baby. You are going to be a dad! Aren’t you excited?”

“Are you sure it’s mine?”

First slap in the face.

“Yes. Of course, it’s yours. You know me. I’m not that type of person.” ‘What was he saying? Of course, it was his kid. I can even tell you when it happened. It wasn’t an actual grand memory. He got drunk and “forced” but I didn’t stop him. So, I wanted to, but I was trying to wait until marriage; but things happen when you are in the moment. But it was still my first time, and I have been faithful since. ‘ “Why are you reacting this way? We were going to have kids in the future. It’s just a couple months early.”

“To be honest, I was going to have kids, but just not your kids.”

Second Slap.

‘I couldn’t speak. What!?! Not my kids? Than whose kids?’ “What!?! I don’t understand you at all? If not our kids; than whose?”

“Julissa’s. She’s hot. Our kids will be hot too. If I’m going to bring kids into the world, I want them to be top notch. Our kids would be average. Sure, they might be intelligent, but intelligence only gets you so far in the world. As you know, eventually a smart person has to marry an attractive or wealthy person to stay relevant. I thought you understood your role in our life. You are just a placement to make my parents happy.”

Third slap to the face.

‘At least the truth came out now. Can you imagine if this pregnancy hadn’t happened. If I had just continued to live on cloud nine. What would have happened after we had gotten married. He probably would have lived elsewhere and left me alone. I wanted to hurt him. I had given him six years of my youth. I’m now twenty-one years old. Pregnant with a child that my fiancé doesn’t actually want. “Why wouldn’t you tell me this before. You could have married the one you wanted to. What am I supposed to do now?”

“Just go get it taken care of.”

Fourth slap to the face.

‘Not going to happen. Was he always this person?’ “Well, that’s not going to happen. What is your back-up idea?” ‘Even if he didn’t want my kids; I wanted them. So as much as I feared his reply; giving up on my child was not an option.’

“Handle it. Or I will.”

I saw something in his eyes as he said those words. It terrified me. ‘Was he always this way?’ I said nothing. I feared what he might do to me. I texted my sister to come pick me up. Her reply said ten minutes. That was too long. I didn’t think I could sit here with this man another second. I feared for my child’s life. There was a group of men sitting across the hall. I know it was reckless, but I got up from my seat and wandered over to their table. “Can I sit with you all for ten minutes?”

They all went silent and just stared at me.

I could feel John behind me starting to stir and come my way. ‘Please! Help me!’ I silently screamed in my head! I jumped as a hand touched my shoulder. I turned in fear expecting to see it was John, but instead it was a guy with sandy blonde hair. He smiled at me.

“Sure. No problem at all. Take my seat. I’ll grab another chair.”

The new man walked off, just after he positioned me in his seat. I relaxed a smidge. Until a hand grabbed my shoulder and dug his fingers into my skin. I tried to get away, but it was pointless. I was being lifted from my chair, by my shoulder. I was about to stand when the sandy haired man was once again beside me.

He lifted John’s hand from my shoulder. “Do you have a problem?” This new man stood between me and John. I felt protected.

“I don’t know why she came over here, but my fiancé and I are leaving. Get up, Cassie.” He reached towards me once again.

I shrank away. I didn’t want that hand to touch me again. I don’t know what would happen if I left with him.

Instead of me, the sandy haired man’s hand intercepted John’s arm. “I think you guys need some time apart to think. Cassie, doesn’t seem to want to be around you right now. How about this. She can hang out with us until someone else comes to pick her up. We,” he gestured to the men around the table, “are all upstanding citizens. Your fiancé will not be harmed in our company. But I insist you retract your hand and leave.”

‘Would he leave? Would he go? I have never seen John listen to anyone especially a stranger.’ But I still sat there behind the sandy haired man and cowered into a smaller person; trying to hide myself from John.

“Cassie. If you do not leave with me now. We are through.”

‘Really!?! So, if I don’t say anything he will end this awful relationship. Will it really be that easy. I could be free of John by just staying quiet!?!’ I said nothing.

“I mean it!” John practically screamed at me.

Still silent. ‘Just go John. Leave! I don’t want this relationship any more than you do. LEAVE!’

I still sat there. Cowering. I was worried a hand would latch onto me again. And drag me away into darkness. ‘Go away. Go away. Please, go away.’ A hand touched my shoulder, and I yelped and jumped up out of my chair and away from the hand. I was going to fight if I needed to.

“Miss. Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt you,” the sandy haired man was speaking to me.

I relaxed. But then I started to sob. I collapsed onto the floor. My body finally let go of everything. I just sat there wallowing in my own sadness. Until I felt my body being lifted and onto a chair. A jacket was draped over my bended legs. A comforting arm was around my shoulders. And a slowly soft pat from a warm hand on my shoulder. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know how long I sat there. I don’t know anything. All I knew was I was going to raise this baby. And this baby would be loved. And the best thing I’ve ever done, is separate my child from the evil man I almost married.

March 17, 2024

Present

‘Why am I here. I don’t know why me, a single mom is at a St. Patrick group dating thing. I know why, my sister dragged me along. She said something like I needed to experience and be around adults. I don’t know why. I’m perfectly happy being around my son. He’s all anyone would need. I already miss him.’

As if my sister knew what I was doing, she swiped my phone from me. “No. You are not a mom tonight. You are my kick-butt sister that deserves someone to love her unconditionally like her son does. There has to be a guy out there in the world that is your actual match. Not the butthead.”

I know. I know. I deserve more. She has been saying this since that day at that restaurant. I was completely out of it that night. I remember the fear, but also sandy blonde hair. I never knew his name, but I will always be grateful to him. He probably saved my son’s and my own life that night. But when Sarah had showed up, her top priority was to get me safely in the car. Sandy blonde haired man carried me to the car, placed me on the seat, and buckled me in. But his words are still with me.

“You deserve better. Be thankful God blessed you with a child. A child is the greatest gift to receive. Focus on the good. You will be a great mom.”

I actually have that painted as a sign in my home. It reminds me every day of what choice I made five years ago. But it also reminds me, that I made the right choice that night.

However, here I sat at a table full of women and men. I felt so socially awkward. I haven’t truly been out in public, at night, in almost six years. Raising a son is difficult; but I didn’t do it alone. My family helped me. It took some time for my father to accept it, but I think when he held his grandson for the first time; all his anger melted away. I should say the anger towards me melted. Everyone will forever hate John. ‘Wow, that’s the first time I’ve said his actually name in a long time. His new name is butthead. But he hasn’t really been spoken of, since Micheal James was born. I named my son after my dad and brother. Focus, Cassie. Focus. You are with people. Adult people. Spacing out will not look good. Focus.’

I focused back into where I was. I was sitting at a long table. Women on one side, men on the other. I think this is actually speed dating. That’s somewhat better. Usually, I can only hold an adult conversation for about five minutes before I switch to children’s topics. And from a few past experiences I discovered that men do not like women who have kids; or can’t hold a grown-up conversation. I wonder if Sarah knew all this and chose this group speed dating on purpose. Probably. She’s a great sister.

“Alright Ladies and Gentlemen!” The hostess called out into the room. The room of people quieted. “You all know how this goes. You have five minutes to talk to the man or woman in front of you. Spend the time wisely. You also have a sheet in front of you. You will mark the people you think you meshed well with, and at the end we will see if any of you matched. Please do not mark everyone listed on your page. Your page will not be calculated. Now, let the dating begin!”

The night was not a total failure yet. I learned several new things. That there are quite a few single people out there that have children. Men and women. But I also learned new and interesting hobbies people have. One man did exercise, another reading, another dancing, another skydiving, etc. Several “hobbies” seemed like just alone time for a parent, but I guess reading can be a hobby. At the break my sister explained that it just an ice breaker; asking what your hobbies are. It helps keep the conversation going if the talking slows. That makes sense; however, I do so much in a day, that I try to only have a few needed conversations. That most of my talking is spent with my son.

This so far has been an interesting experience, but my sheet was still blank. I didn’t find “the spark” that the hostess had mentioned with anyone. She had said you would just know. But I don’t trust my “knowing” feeling. I knew the feeling. It was what I had felt with John. And obviously it was a lie. It was probably just loneliness speaking. But I can’t trust that feeling. Never again. Now that I know that; I should probably just leave. I’m probably wasting the time of these other men who are trying to find someone. I would like to find someone, but I don’t know if I’m ready yet.

The break was almost over. I knew it was not my night and I needed to leave. I looked at my sister. She looked at me, and I pleaded with her silently. She understood because she got up from her chair and handed me my phone. “I’m sorry, Sarah. I just think…”

“I totally understand. I just wanted you to try. Just don’t give up. You should always leave your heart open for a chance. Just don’t shut your heart. God can only help so much; you have to be open to the idea.”

I hugged her. She knew me. She knew what I was thinking even if I couldn’t put it into words. “Thanks Sis. I will. I’ll just go sit at the bar. I’ll wait for you.” I gathered up my belongings. I took my sheet up to the hostess and explained my situation. She seemed frustrated but still allowed me to cancel my spot. This is better for everyone. I wouldn’t want the men to risk everything on me. They deserve happiness too. I headed to the bar just as the bell clanged starting up round two.

I wish I had just gotten a cab home. I didn’t realize that the speed dating would go until midnight. It was only eleven o’clock. I still had an hour for it to be done, but also probably another twenty minutes of the results being handed out and the chit chat that happens after.

No one was sitting around me. I decided to call my little man. He was probably still wide awake at my parents’ house. He loves his grandparents. I called my mom through facetime. A groggy woman answered the phone. “I’m sorry mom. I didn’t think you would be asleep yet. Is Michael still awake?”

“Hmm…let me see,” mom dropped the phone to her side. I know because I was seeing their house upside-down. “He is sleeping with your dad on the couch,” she turned the camera to show me a sweet sight.

My dad was passed out amongst books and toys; and my son was sleeping on his chest. They both were snoring little snores. ‘So cute!’ That’s good. I’m happy they had a great night together. I miss living with them. “Thanks mom. Sorry I woke you. You can go back to sleep.”

“Okay. Thanks sweetie. How’s it going? Did you meet anyone?”

“No. I don’t think I’m ready yet. I didn’t want to give these other fellows false hope. So, I’m just waiting for Sarah at the bar.”

My mom’s face got really close to the camera, “You sure? Then who is the man behind you? He’s handsome. I approve my sweet daughter. Goodnight.” And she hung up.

‘Man behind me?’ I turned on my stool and indeed there stood a man. And yes, he was handsome. But maybe I was in his way. “Do you need something behind me,” I scooted off my stool to allow him to get to whatever he needed. But he didn’t move. He just looked at me. At me. Like AT ME! I tried to walk away. I don’t know why but being looked at like that made me uneasy. But then a hand stopped me. I turned and looked at the hand; it belonged to the man. But the touch didn’t disturb me; like others had. His touch was soft and warm. Like… ‘WAIT!’ I searched his face again. But all I remembered from that night was sandy blonde hair; and this man had dark brown hair. He was handsome, but other than the touch he wasn’t familiar. “Can I help you? Did you mistake me for someone else?”

His hand dropped. “You don’t remember me?” His eyes spoke with sadness. “I thought…”

“If I met you in the past I’m sorry. I’ve had a busy six years raising my son.” ‘Usually that statement ends conversations with handsome men.’

“You had your kid. That’s awesome! That’s a relief. All those years or wondering if you had or not.”

‘Huh?’ “Do you know me?” I looked at him again, but nothing jumped out at me.

“Yeah. I met you about six years ago. I guess I’m not the memorable type. I thought you would at least remember how I had helped you that day,” he brushed his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry to bother you, Miss.” And he turned to go.

‘Wait!’ I grabbed his arm this time. “Say that again.” I probably seemed crazy.

“What?” the man had stopped but he yanked his arm away from me.

“What you just said. Please say it again.”

“I thought you would remember me.”

“After that.”

“I’m sorry to bother you.” He started to walk away.

“NO! The Miss. Please say Miss again.”

“Miss. Why just that part?”

“Please, just say it. Just like you did before.”

He sighed. He shook his head but still he said, “I’m sorry to have bothered you, Miss.”

It was him. I knew it was. I don’t know why or how, but I walked right up to him and kissed him. I kissed him. ‘I’m kissing him!?!’ I stepped away from him covering my mouth. “I’m sorry. I…I… I’m…” He was stunned. I was flabbergasted. Then it was turning into embarrassment. I had to get out of there. I tried to rush away. But that hand stopped me. I knew his touch. It was him. But kissing him was not the right first step. I couldn’t turn to look at him. I could feel the red creeping up.

“Look at me,” he said.

I couldn’t. But I did turn in his direction. He deserved to speak to me however he wanted.

“Miss look at me.”

‘No. He would see the red.’

“Miss. Please,” his voice was just like that night.

I couldn’t help but respond. I looked up. I knew my face was bright red. He just stared at me. “What…” I couldn’t finish my thought, because he kissed me back.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Turns out Gregory (sandy haired man) had been looking for Cassie since that night he saved her from John. But with no such luck he gave up. Until he got a call from one of his buddies at the speed dating; that friend had been at the table that night eight years ago. He recognized Cassie from that night, and he instantly called Gregory to come and get his girl. However, when Gregory had gotten to the restaurant his buddy told him that his girl left. But that she had walked over to the direction of the bar. If anything, his buddy would hunt down the girl that Cassie had been talking to; Gregory’s girl would not disappear again.

Gregory walked into the bar area and saw her. She was facetiming someone. It had better not be a boyfriend or husband; but she had been at the speed dating. Gregory decided to face it head on. No, she was talking to her mom it seemed like. Good, there’s a chance she is single.

But then Cassie didn’t recognize him. His world came crashing down. She didn’t remember him. Not super surprising; he had dyed his hair and grown up. But he had hoped she would have remembered him at least a little.

Then to add salt to the wound she asked to repeat myself. She really was good at killing a possibility completely.

But then she was kissing me. ME! Wait what? She stopped. She pulled away and tried to run. Not going to happen. I caught her and pulled her in to return the favor. She was my girl, and she would be my girl until the end.

.-.-.-.-.

Short Stories, Uncategorized

Short Story #1

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To the guy who may come looking for me, no matter how long it takes.

.-.-.

Ashley

It was summer. I was thousands of miles away from home. My mom had planned my summer to be spent as a exchange student. I had asked her, about this is previous years, but she was never willing. Always saying something like, “I can’t send my baby across the US.” But for some reason this year I was allowed.

I’m now 18 years old. Which I guess I’m happy she had me wait until now. Traveling the distance might have been impossible a couple years ago. But I made it and I’ve been here about a month.

The family is great. They really are. The mom reminds me so much of my mom. Except I call her Mrs. Stevens, not mom. The kids are also great. There is Vanessa; she is 15 years old. She’s always gushing over boys. There is Michael; he is 17 years old. It’s nice to have someone close to my own age. Except we have nothing in common. He is into so many things; where as, I’ve been living a very quiet life. Just painting and reading. I don’t know where all my energy had gone these last few years. But then there is Daniel. He is 21 years old. He goes out most nights. But when I do get to talk to him he is a great guy. I would have liked to have him as an older brother.

But that’s it. I guess Mr. Stevens. He is a great man too. ‘This whole family is great’ But Mr. Stevens was a great person. He just worked a lot. I occasionally got to see him; if he got to come home early. Which was not often. But my mom picked the greatest home for me to visit. I hope I can come stay with them again in the future.

It’s just my mom, and my two younger siblings back home. I love them, but I would have loved to have a sibling close to my age growing up. This family is so close.

Today was Tuesday. Nothing special planned today. Instead, I did my daily inspiration book. My mom got it for me, just before I left. She said it might help me be adventurous and explore life. It was a strange gift to get from my mom; she has been telling me the past two years to be sheltered through life. But I actually enjoy the book. I’ve been going through it this last month. Today’s title read, “Do a brave thing today!” The entry was pretty much as you can imagine. Do something out of your comfort zone. Seize the day! Take the initiative. ‘So be the opposite of myself.’ I think this might be the first entry I don’t attempt.

But I should have known. The moment I finished, the front door swung open. And a guy about Daniels age walked through the door. ‘Wow.’ He was so gorgeous. I’ve never seen anyone like him before. Before he caught my gaping mouth I composed myself. I gathered up my books from the dinning room table and started towards my room.

“Ashley,” Daniel called out to me as he walked through the front door, “you don’t have to leave. You can stay and meet my friends.”

I just realized that a large group of guys stood in the living room. I nodded my head to each of the guys, and then I came to the guy that made my heart flutter. He had sandy blond hair. Tanned skin. He looked strong, but not huge. he had the greenest eyes ever. ‘I’ll probably draw him if I get the chance.’ But I must have been staring to long at him, because a smirk formed on his mouth.

I turned back towards Daniel, “You sure. I can always head back to my room. I don’t want to be in your way.”

“Do you guys mind if Ashley hangs out with us for the day?” He almost yelled towards the group behind him.

A loud chorus, “No!” Rang back.

I laughed. I nodded and placed my books on the table behind me. I began getting some beverages from the fridge. I wasn’t part of this family, but I felt like this was something to do.

But I had a feeling…like something was waiting for me when I turned around. I place the red solo cups and juices on the island; I poured myself a cup of lemonade. I turned and there he was standing where he had been before. He was talking to one of the other guys. But he looked in my direction; he quickly looked away like I had caught him. ‘That must have been the feeling.’ I smirked to myself. I carried my lemonade with me and walked past the guy with the greenest eyes. I walked over to Daniel. But that feeling was still there. ‘He must be watching me.’ I didn’t look again. I had no chance with someone like him.

I was introduced to most of the guys. They were all really cool. A group of friends I wish I had at school or in my neighborhood. Thankfully I wasn’t introduced to green eyes; I don’t know if I would have been able to stay composed. I’ve never been one to gush; I’ve never had this feeling before. My quiet life was that, quiet.

But the day was great day. I spent most of it with the guys. We played board games, watched a movie, played video games, they asked me questions about Maine. Mostly told them it’s the complete opposite of California.

But that feeling had been there throughout the day. I would feel it, and then it would be gone. Once I peeked over my shoulder and those green eyes locked with mine. I didn’t want to make it weird, so I smiled back, nodded, and returned back to my conversation. I had peeked over my shoulder once more, and green eyes had a smirk in his mouth as he spoke to the guy beside him. I smiled too and returned back to the conversation around me.

Well the day continued and several of the guys dissipated. But then dinner time came rolling around, and it was a mass exodus. I waved goodbye to the guys as each one left. Some called out to me as the left, “Maybe we’ll come visit you in Maine!”

I laughed. That would be fun, but probably not going to happen. I just smiled and waved them out the door. The last one pulled the door closed behind him. I hadn’t seen green eyes leave, but he must have snuck out of the house throughout the day. The feeling had been gone a while. I was sad to say the least, but I was happy that I hadn’t made a fool of myself.

Just then Mrs. Stevens rushed through the door layered up with groceries.

“Mrs…” I rushed over to help her.

“More in the car…!” Mrs. Steven’s huffed out as she continued to the island.

I nodded and went outside to grab some of the groceries from her car. There was only four bags left. ‘Haha! Why did Mrs. Stevens always carry all the bags.’ But I too decided to do the same thing. I gathered up the four bags onto my wrists and hands. They were maybe a smidge too heavy for me. But I was going to try. I placed them on the ground and pushed the button to close the hatch. I scooped up the bags just as a hand reached out and grabbed onto my hand. I yanked my hand away startled only to see the hand belonged to the green eyed guy from before.

“Hi. I never formally introduced myself earlier,” he grabbed three of the bags from my hands. “I’m Andrew.” And he turned and walked back to the house.

I stood there a moment. ‘Huh? Wait what?’ I started towards the front door. ‘Well I’m sure I failed that idea of being composed.’ I walked back through the front door and it was confirmed. Andrew had a huge grin on his face, and as I walked inside his eyes sparkled for a moment and he smirked in my direction. ‘Oh. Kill me now. Definitely a fail.’

Dinner was great. Mrs. Stevens made delicious burgers. Definitely a recipe I want to try when I go back home. ‘Home. I didn’t want to leave in two months.’ I wanted to stay longer. I wanted to…. ‘Be honest. You want to stay to get to know Andrew.’ And that was definitely the truth. I know I shouldn’t have, but I was already, and totally into him. I shouldn’t. Because I would be leaving. I didn’t want my first relationship to only last two months. I wanted my first one to be my last one. But that wasn’t going to be possible with him.

I don’t know why I was thinking these things. I didn’t even know him. He probably had a girlfriend. But then that question was answered for me by Daniel. He had asked if Andrew was dating anyone, and Andrew answered with a no; that he hadn’t found a special one to start anything with. ‘Well that’s at least promising. No! Stopping thinking about it. It’s not a possibility!’ I started to feel dizzy. I excused myself from the table. I headed towards the bathroom and it started. My nose was pouring blood again. This hasn’t happened since I left for this trip, but this was nothing new. I held my hand under my nose as I rushed to the bathroom.

It wasn’t stopping. I continued to shove toilet paper into my nose hoping to stuffer the blood.

A knock on the door startled me, “Yes?” I croaked out.

“Honey,” it was Mrs. Stevens, “you okay in there? You’ve been gone about 10min. Can you let me in?”

I really didn’t want to. I didn’t want her to worry. But also because it look like a murder happened in her bathroom. I had smeared blood all over the floor and what looked like a blood stained sink. But I knew she would be more worried.

I walked over and cracked the door open. She came in through the crack in the door and gasped. But I gasped as I locked eyes with Andrew. Who also stood in the hallway. I broke contact with him and closed the door. ‘I hope this door is sound proof.’ As I turned back around to face Mrs. Stevens anger, but I found her cleaning up all the blood. She wasn’t speaking. Just cleaning. ‘I must be in trouble.’ I tried to help her, but instead she sat me down on the bath tub edge and continued to clean. ‘Probably for the best. I don’t know how much help I would be. I was still dizzy. The travel time must have had a late response.’

Finally it felt like the bleeding stopped. I removed the toilet paper from my nose and washed my face. I had blood smeared on my upper lip. Mrs. Stevens had also finished up the cleaning and had taken and small container from a cabinet. She opened it and rubbed some of the contents on my face. It smelled divine. I felt refreshed. I didn’t want to but I looked up into Mrs. Stevens face. She tried to hide concern but I saw it. I reassured I was fine, and not to worry. But I knew she was worried. She kissed me on the forehead and left me in the clean bathroom.

I looked at myself once more in the mirror, but then I felt that feeling. I turned to find Andrew still leaning against the wall in the hallway. I gasped. And he must have heard it, because his eyes found mine. Concern filled those green eyes. I missed the smirk. I nodded to him, and tried to walk by him. Instead I tripped on my own feet and fell into his arms. ‘Great. Perfect…’ I could feel my face growing warmer. I tried to pry myself out of his arms, but it seemed like my legs were not going to hold me. I slumped more into his arms.

“I know this must seem weird to you. But can I stay here a moment. My feet are fighting against me,” I know it sounded like a stupid excuse, but it was honest at least.

The smirk returned to Andrew’s eyes. But with his nose inches from mine he nodded. He just held me, in silence. I half falling, half stood there listening to his breathing and my own heart.

He broke the silence with a chuckle, “Your dad should be worried about his daughter. Only eighteen and already hugging guys in a hallway,” he smirked again, but still held me.

I’m sure my face reddened. But I don’t know what came over me. I looked up into Andrew’s eyes. Those green eyes and pulled his collar downwards with my hands. And I kissed him. I kissed him. Initially his body stiffened, but it slowly began to relax. My body did the opposite. My body stiffened. I realize what I had just done. I pulled away from Andrew. I don’t know how my legs were working. I didn’t know if they were actually working or not. But I pushed away from him. He looked confused and startled. I couldn’t blame him. I was too. I tried to smile, but instead I just left him there. I was so embarrassed. That was my first kiss. Probably not his. ‘I don’t know.’ All I did know was I needed to get to my room. After what just happened I don’t think I would be able to face anyone. And that’s just what I did. I walked quickly to my room; laid face-down in my bed, and wallowed in my embarrassment. I don’t know when I fell asleep, but I did thankfully.

The next morning I woke up realizing what I had done. I had kissed him. My first kiss was used on a guy that I knew I wasn’t going to end up with. Which really hurt; I wanted to have a one and done experience with love. But what was worse is when I came to breakfast. Mrs. Stevens was standing there with a melancholy look. ‘Did she know what I did last night? Was she sending me home?’

“Good morning, Mrs. Stevens,” I began to gather breakfast makings.

“Honey. I need you to stop and come sit with me a moment.” She gestured to the chair across from her.

‘This can’t be good.’

.-.-. 2 years later.-.-.

Andrew

I shouldn’t complain. My life has been great. I know other guys that have struggled to get through college. But for me it was a breeze. Instead for me the dating life was non existent. I’m not trying to come off cocky, but I know I’m pretty good looking. When girls stop and gape at you as you walk by I’m sure that means I’m doing okay in that department. But why is it I can’t find anyone. Everyone I’ve come into contact with can’t compare to her.

I know I should have gone after her that day she left me shocked in the hallway, but I couldn’t move that day. She had kissed me. I had expected something, but not that progressive action. I didn’t want to admit it, back then, but that was a a great kiss. It must have been because anytime a girl tried to kiss me, in the past two years, I would back away.

But the kiss must have embarrassed her so much that she left the next day. Because I came back the next day to discuss things with her and Mrs. Stevens had told me she had to suddenly go back home. So for two years I went through college life waiting for the chance to go see her. I had heard nothing from her. I had hoped she might send letters to the Stevens’ but it seemed like she just fell off the planet.

But now was my chance. Before I started my job, I decided I would travel to Maine to talk to the girl who ruined my college experience. Ashley.

I had gotten the address from Daniel, who I assume had gotten it from Ashley at some point in her stay. I don’t know why I didn’t think to send a letter first. But that seemed too desperate; especially since she made no attempt to contact me. I’d talk to her when I saw her.

I walked up to the front door of a little blue house. I remember hearing Ashley talk about it that day. I knocked on the front door and waited. I heard a little putter patter walk up to the door. There stood a kid maybe eight years old. She looked like she had been crying for days; her face was splotchy red. She was wearing dark clothes.

‘What does a child have to be sad about?’ “Hello! I’m looking for Ashley. Could you tell her I’m here to see her. My name is Andrew.” That must have been the wrong thing to say because the tears started again. She just stood there wailing. I crouched down trying to comfort her. She pulled away from me, and ran away screaming.

I just stood there confused again. ‘The girls in this family are similar.’ I just waited. But then suddenly a woman, probably Ashley’s mom came to door. And just stood there staring at me. “Hello ma’am. I’m a friend of Ashley’s from California. I was hoping to speak with her.” Again that must have been the wrong thing to say because she began to cry silently. “Ma’ma?” I stepped towards her.

She held up a hand to stop me. “Wait a moment,” she walked away from the opening of the door and came back with an envelope in her hand. “This is yours,” she handed me a rather thick yellow envelope. “I’ll find the other thing. I’ll place it on the porch. I’m sorry I’m not more hospitable. But I need to say goodbye for now. I’m not quite able to function yet. Safe travels home,” and she closed the door.

I stood on the porch alone with the envelope. ‘I’m getting a bad feeling.’ I sat down on the steps I had just walked up. I finally looked at the envelope. It was addressed as: To The Guy That May Come Looking For Me, No Matter How Long It Takes.

.-.-.-.

To Andrew.

You are probably wondering what’s going on. Why did the people you just talked to kept crying. Well as you probably guess, I’m in heaven now. I went back and worth wondering if I should write this letter. But I thought you deserved some answers after I abruptly left that day. I would have wanted answers if our roles had been reversed. So here we go.

I didn’t know any of this until I was suddenly whisked back to Maine after that day. But after that day my life completely changed and so much started to make sense. Why I lived a sheltered life. Why I didn’t have as much energy. Why I had nose bleeds all the time.

I was sick. I had cancer. But my mom decided to keep it from me. She thought I should just live out the rest of my life care-free. That the cancer couldn’t be cured; that I was going to die early. But that I should live every moment to the fullest. And I’m so happy she did, because if I had know sooner I think I would have gone sooner. But I didn’t. And she sent me on a grand adventure to California. Only Mrs. Stevens knew about my condition. Which is why I left the next day; she had called my mom and in a panic they sent me home.

I want you to know. I’m so happy you were there that day. That I got to experience my only love. That I know it is selfish, but I’m happy you were my first and only kiss. Again I didn’t know anything that night. I didn’t know I would never see you again. I didn’t know I was starting something I couldn’t finish. I’m so sorry for that. I didn’t know if I meant anything to you or not. And I couldn’t bring myself to string you along with letters; when I knew there was no chance for us. Part of me hoped I meant something to you, but also I had hoped you had moved past that day.

So with this letter I wanted to explain myself. That I wished everyday that my cancer could be cured and I could go back to you. But I knew that was not possible. By the time I got home I declined so much that I was kept in my room. Then just my bed. Then… So instead I switched my wish. I prayed to God that you would have a life filled with joy, hopes, and love. Yes love. You deserve everything. I hope you can find that girl that makes you steal glances at her. Or makes you smirk because she is gaping at you. Or makes you stunned by a kiss. Wait for her. I prayed that you would find her. She will come.

After all this. I hope you can do a favor for me. My mom should have placed the package on the front porch by now. Please keep your portrait. But please sell the rest of the paintings. My family never understood why you had to be the one to do this. But I didn’t want my mom to have to keep all these paintings that would just keep her in sadness. I did give her some already. I painted her happy memories. So please don’t feel obligated to give her any. But if you could do this last favor for me I will be grateful.

I guess that’s it. I don’t really have anything else to say…I want to keep writing. But this letter has taken me several days to write. I wish I could keep talking to you.

But know this. One day is long enough to know if the person is meant for you. I knew the moment I was in your arms. That you were the one for me. And thank you so much for letting me stay true to myself. That I had one love. I was one and done.

Love,

Ashley

.-.-.

Just another random dream. I have the most vivid dreams when I’m starting to wake up.

I think I’ll be doing this more often. Writing a short story is easier. It only takes a few hours.

Have a wonderful Monday. ❤️ Give your true love today a hug or kiss.