If your future self could send you one sentence, what do you hope it would say?
Be brave; be proud of who you are, and understand you don’t need other’s approval.
I know it’s a few sentences, but I wish I had knew this throughout my life.
Like in elementary school. When my first group of friends were the bullies of the school. I didn’t know that when I became their friends, because I was always swimming whenever there were social things to do.
But looking back now, I’m sure I knew subconsciously at the time. But I wasn’t confident enough in myself that I would find friends that would want me. I’m happy to say though that I stopped being their friends when they told me to bully someone else. Umm…no… I’m not one to make anyone an outsider; I like including everyone.
But I wish I had been braver to stand up and tell them they were wrong and that they should try and be better people. So first part: be brave.
In my teenage years, I was proud of who I was. I was a Christian trying to be strong in my faith, being around unbelievers. As a parent now, man that was rough. Trying to figure yourself out; and constantly being drowned by others trying to make you do wrong. It was tough. Really tough.
I wish I could have told myself to be strong. Be proud of who you are. Be proud to be a Christian. Be an example to those that might have needed one.
The other issue was that there was a girl who portrayed herself as a Christian. (And she might have been, but maybe was lost at the time) but her actions and lifestyle choices would suggest otherwise. And me wanting to be a proud Christian didn’t want to be put into the same category as her. Into the category of I’m using my faith to appear innocent and unattainable to guys, but date around. I didn’t want my faith to be tainted. But I wish I had been stronger. To stand tall and proud in my faith. No matter what. So second part: be proud.
My adult years. I wish I had known that I don’t need approval of others. Not always, but usually the people who need to anoint their approval on you, are not the people that you need in your life. That if you don’t do everything right and everything they say; that you will not be approved and you will probably be shunned.
I’ve had several people like this through my life. That I wish I could have told myself that you are great the way you are, and you don’t need their approval. I’ve recently come to grips with this, after my most recent encounter with someone. But now, my life is better! I don’t stress over acceptance. I don’t nitpick all my actions. I don’t be selective in my ideas. I am just me, and I’m assertive of who I am now. I’m pretty much at the point of, “this is me; if you don’t approve, then we will agree to disagree.” Life is only so long. I’m going to start filling my life with people who will help me thrive and grow. Especially in my faith. I want to surround myself with other Christians, and drench my kids in people who love the Lord. So that they grow up the way I hope they will.
That they will be brave. Be brave to do what is right, even if they are the only ones doing it.
Be proud. I want them to love the Lord. I want them to desire to know Him more. I hope they will be rich in God’s love. But also to be proud to be seen as a God fearing, loving person. That their actions show, even if they don’t speak.
And live knowing you don’t need and won’t get everyone’s approval. And that is perfectly fine. There really are only a few people in life you need to approve of you. God. As my kids keep telling me, they love Him most! My husband. I always want my husband’s approval. My mom. Yes, even if we don’t agree on some things I will still want my mom’s approval in my life. I ask her questions often, especially now as I’m diving into the Bible more. My kids. Not so much their approval, but I want them to respect me. That I can be a good role model for them. And maybe another is, if you’re lucky, your pastor. Some people can have a relationship with their pastor. Our church is probably too big. I’m just at least hoping to make some friends, who also love God.
I know being friends with non believers is good. It is good to be an example to them, to show that that everyone makes mistakes. Everyone struggles. Everyone sins. But the difference is we Christians get back up, ask for forgiveness, and try to live right again.
So after all that. I wish I could tell myself, Be brave! Be proud of who you are. And you don’t need other’s approval.
Even if I didn’t have this knowledge back then, I have kids now…





