Tag Archives: Mothers

Life As a Mama #2

I made a dumb deal with my husband when the baby was born…I would change all the diapers but he has to deal with any dead animals, spiders, etc. I thought it was a great deal in the beginning but now my life is forever diaper based. 😓

He occasionally does it…begrudgingly, but he does.

I tried to make this task not so dreary; I put the trash can away from my changing station. Mostly I did that to keep the trash can away from my smart cookie, but I try and make the diapers in with a toss. However I’m realizing that if I miss I need to walk over and throw it away quickly, because I’ve caught my sneaky thing trying to grab them through the gate.🤢 Not something a baby should play with.

It used to be basketball…swish, swish. Now it’s diapers…smelly, smelly.

Our munch.

Well she is getting so big. My days are packed full. I thankfully get me time here and there, but it always seems like it’s not enough. I guess that’s what happens when you begin parenthood.

However, all of her new portions in her personality makes it all worth it.

She now does that cute bouncing dance; the one that all babies seem to do. She loves Disney music, old rock and roll, and country. Occasionally we will play a techno song and she just runs around the room like she got a burst of energy.

She recognizes certain animals; she is definitely a dog person. Whenever a commercial with dogs comes on she points and bounces withal her giggles. We purposely play YouTube videos of dogs; I think that is her favorite thing to watch.

She talks a bit more. She says dada more than mama, she usually just yells at me. It’s crazy as a mama I can understand her even Th Pugh she can’t talk. But she has said yes occasionally. Usually when I ask her if she is hungry or if she wants to FaceTime grandma. Calling grandma is one of her favorite things to do. 💕

Last new thing is we have discovered she has just as much patience as my husband does. 😂 I was hoping she would get both of our amounts of patience and have double it, but no, she is quick tempered at this age. I understand she gets frustrated because she knows how to do something but can’t make her body do what she is thinking.

We have a smart cookie. She will sit and figure something out and once she has she masters it. Like escaping…she is just like me in this habit.

Sending love to my mama ❤️ you had me, and now I have her. I see so much of me in her. She is a troublemaker.

Lots of love 💕

Kiss.

I think the sweetest thing in the world… Is getting a kiss from your baby. When they don’t know how to give you a smooch and they just open up their mouth and place their whole everything on your cheek… and they give a soft giggle at the same time; it is one of the sweetest things in the world.

And when you return the kiss they laugh and giggle. That small giggle makes you feel so happy and warm.

As I’m writing this she’s talking along with me. She wants to help as mommy writes.

Even if it’s a thought of a kiss or a real one give it to someone you love today.💕

So you ever feel like your life stopped before it began. It’s not like I gave up or anything, but it seems like I’m in a rut.

Which when I say it (or typed it) it sounds awful because I’m a mama now. I have a wonderful 8 month old baby and I am super happy. She is now my everything.

I just feel like I missed out on a lot of things. Like college, I’ve never wanted to go to college before, but recently I’ve been regretting it. The social aspect of college, having only 2 life long friends you never see is difficult…

But again I love being a mama.

I guess a lot of it is, is that I gave up a lot of hobbies. I don’t do anything anymore. I don’t draw, paint, sew, dance, socialize…

Which again, I know, when you become a mama lots of things change, but I miss those activities.

As soon as my sleeping schedule is normal I will get back into drawing, but like today, my baby is wide awake at 2:00am; so it might be awhile.

I guess for me, I shouldn’t feel like I do, but I do. I’m in a rut and I don’t see me changing anytime soon.

But I love my baby dearly. She is my sweet thing. And she knows it ❤️

My sweet thing at 3:03 am

Country living…

Someone asked me why we decided to move to Montana…

Moving from California is either a good thing or a crazy thing considering the person. Some people say, “why would you move here,” usually with a ghastly surprise. Others usually people born in Montana, “why did you California people have to come to our Montana.”

Usually my answer comes to main point of, I wanted to give me children a different life. Growing up playing in mud, running wild.

My mama gave me a great childhood, I managed to play in mud and be a crazy child…but now trying to let your baby run wild in California you have to keep an eye on them. Or have a tall fence… Believe me you still have to watch your babies in Montana, but you feel a sense of release, like you have a bit more trust with your neighbors.

At this moment I’m sitting in the truck waiting for my baby to awaken. She is taking her afternoon nap. My husband is working on cutting some wood for future projects. We are at our friends house a few miles outside of town. It’s peaceful here. To most people the thought of sitting in a car waiting for a baby to wake up seems boring or wasteful of a day. But looking out the truck window I have a wonderful view. My baby is sleeping and I’m listening to country music. It’s a peaceful afternoon.

Enjoy you weekend no matter where you are. There is always a way to see the happiness wherever you are. ❤️

Picture: Farm Life, April, 13th, 2019

Taken by: emily2jane

Self conscious…

Being called out for one of your past selfs actions, can hit you and make you feel so self conscious. It’s amazing I thought as I grew up I wouldn’t get embarrassed as much…mostly because having a baby changes you.

But still having someone you love make-fun of something you did before, makes your heart hurt. I know it wasn’t on purpose and the person meant to be funny but I’ve always been a self conscious person. I’m not spontaneous, I can’t be…especially now as the thing I was teased about was something I did spontaneously. It makes you think back through your life and question everything else.

Writing helps me deal with my problems or feelings, and move past them. It’s not a big thing it’s just something small…but it still gets me.

So I guess…don’t be afraid to be spontaneous. It terrifies me, but I’ll teach my daughter to be…she’ll learn the awesomeness of planning, but I hope she will not be as self conscious…being self conscious 90% of the time is not the greatest way to live. But I make do, because that’s how I am and I want to be just me.

Happy Tuesday, just because every day should be a happy day…😊

My cover photo ‘Facebook picture’ didn’t have someone’s name, just something I found.