Life Of Two Best Friends: College CHPT 17

CHAPTER 18

‘I have no words. I…’I have so many emotions cascading over me that I don’t know which I should latch onto.’ Excited, that it is true Jenny liked me. Sadness, what Jenny must have experienced as my dad…MY DAD! said for her to hide away her feelings; similar to what he is telling me currently. Anger, knowing that I could have been with Jenny all those months before leaving. Annoyance, at Dad for keeping this from me these last two years. The pain…Jenny must have felt these last two years all alone. I wasn’t there for her. I was gone, and knew nothing. Yes. My swimming has become a success but, how…? ‘As I said before, I have no idea how I should be feeling.’ “Dad? How could you keep all of this from me?”

Dad broke. He collapsed into his own tears.

‘Dad!?!’ I opened the glove box and pulled out a wad of napkins.

Frantically he accepted them. “I…thank you George,” Dad collected himself once again.

But this time I could feel the guilt and sadness exuding frim his posture. “Dad?”

“I regret what I told her that day. I know that it was the best thing for your swimming. I aksed her as a caring father. But after what she went through; I have never forgiven myself. The day Brown called me asking for help, to send her to Europe I was confused. I knew about the rumor but I always assumed nothing could break Jenny. She was strong,” Dad gazed out the window. “But seeing her that day, an empty shell, I knew I had done wrong. I told her to close her heart, and that day, her heart was turned off completely.”

‘Dad…’

“Her art piece on the wall was vibrant and expressive. I knew it was her piece, but anyone else who would have seen the blank expression, hollow shell of person next to it would have denied that she was indeed the artist. I…I did all I could to make her trip and life in Europe comfortable; I think it was my way trying to fix what I broke.”

‘No words.’

Silence filled the truck. The only noise was Jeremy’s continous breathing. I glanced at the time and the half an hour was gone. We needed to leave. “Dad…”

He didn’t move.

“I forgive you. And it is not your fault about Jenny,” I placed a hand on his shoulder closest to me, and I felt his body begin to shake once more. “Dad?”

“It’s tears of relief. I…have been dreading this day, but also anticipating it. I…thank you so much George,” and he broke down again.

I fished out more napkins. “You good? I have to wake up the dead one,” I thumbed to the backseat.

“Go ahead,” Dad blew his nose and recomposed himself. “I’m good. But I won’t be taking you inside this time. Goodbye Son,” Dad leaned across the arm rest and gave me an awkward hug.

I still accepted that hug, “Bye Dad. Be careful on the way home.” I reached back and smacked Jeremy in the stomache, “Look alive! You’ve got to move!”

Jeremy shot up into a sitting position, “Ouch! I’m up, I’m up.”

I laughed and quickly grabbed my backpack and hopped out. I heard Jeremy thank Dad for the ride and he too got out. “Bye Dad,” I waved into the back window. Dad returned the wave and pulled away from the curb.

‘It still stings. But I understand it…’

…

‘Jenny.’ She was sitting on the front porch swing with her mom. I knew it was her, even though her back was to me. Her red hair shimmered everytime her head popped back into the sunlight. Coach had picked us up from the small airport; there was no way for us to rent a car. On the drive over Coach explained that Jenny was doing better, but that we were not to mention what happened unless she was the one to bring it up. Jeremy was worried since he was the so called start of the rumor; he was worried he would set her off just by being there. Jeremy of course did not voice these concerns to Coach; instead I read them all over his face, as Coach drove us to this home. It was the vaction apartment that Dad, other mom, and I used to come to during winter vacations. ‘Back when our family was actually happy…so like when I was eight years old.’

Coach walked past Jeremy and I and approached Jenny and Mrs. Brown on the porch. He leaned over and kissed both Jenny and his wife on the tops of their heads. He quietly comunicated to them; I thought he was telling them about our presence, but instead he looked into the front door and shook his head.

Jeremy and I were approaching slowly; we seemed to be in limbo. ‘Do we come. Do we wait? Are we going to live out here?’ Coach glaced back towards us and tilted his head up motioning to us to come.

Jenny’s head must have noticed her Stepdad’s quick movement, because just as we were approaching the porch her head turn towards Jeremy and myself.

Those green eyes caught my gaze; ‘Those beautiful green eyes.’ Her gaze shifted to my left. ‘Oh, right. Jeremy is here too.’ I was going to glance at Jeremy, but my eyes were glue to Jenny’s face. I could see surprise and shock initally in her expression; but then almost a second I thought I saw hatered, but it was gone and her expression now read sadness. This is not the Jenny I remember; her spark was gone. ‘What did I do to this girl?’ I realized that Jeremy and myself had not moved; so I pulled Jeremy along with me as we came to the first step.

“We good to set our stuff down,” I asked Coach, who was standing in the doorway still gazing at Jenny.

“Sure. Come on in,” Coach threw the front door open and headed up the stairs.

Jeremy followed Coach quickly up the stairs; wanting to escape the stares of silence.

I paused only sightly, I returned my gaze back to…those green eyes; they were once again looking at me. ‘Jenny.’ I wanted to talk to her, but I wanted to find the perfect timing. I nodded to both Jenny and her mom, and then followed Jeremy inside. ‘I’ll find the time.’

Life Of Two Best Friends: College CHPT 16

CHAPTER 17

My plan had been: to head home, grab a travel bag, and start driving up to them; but Dad stopped me.

“I’ll buy the tickets. Fly instead. So that you will have time to talk, but also time to get back,” Dad pulled out his phone to purchase the flights. “Do you want to leave now?”

I looked at Jeremy and he just nodded. “Yes, now.”

“I’ll book it. Go shower and then I’ll drive you both there,” Dad left the room, to probably use his laptop.

I didn’t move at first. ‘Jenny.’ “Go shower in the guest bedroom, Jeremy,” I dashed to the stairs to use my own bedroom’s shower.

…

“Jeremy,” Dad suddenly said on our way to the airport.

“Yes, Mr. Matthews?”

“Can you put in some ear buds. I need to discuss something with George,” Dad was focusing on driving but I could see a look of concern in his expression.

“Of course. I need a nap, after that practice. Dude,” Jeremy swatted at my arm before sprawling out on the back seat, “wake me when we are close,” and Jeremy was out.

‘What does Dad want?’ “What’s up Dad?”

Silence. Then Dad sighed, “I understand your confusion from yesterday. Finding out you have pretty much been living as a zombie, and also finding out about Jenny…” Dad paused. “But I need you to hide those feelings for this trip.”

It took me a minute to register what Dad just said. ‘Hide?’ “What are you talking about. This is the whole reason I’m going on this trip. The whole reason I am acting like a crazy person on a mission. What do you mean by hide?”

Dad pulled to the right, all the way to the slow lane, “Son…Jenny is still broken…”

‘Broken?’

“Brown called and told me that she was home, but that she was still hurt. He described her as faking a smile. She is smiling, but he could still see the pain…” Dad grabbed the back of his neck. “I hope she will listen to Jeremy’s apology and hopefully it will help her to move past it; it was already a pistol to get Brown to understand that Jeremy is not to be blamed. That just his name was used to start the fire, and that he had no knowledge of this happening.”

‘I get it. Jenny needs to heal before her heart can accept anyone…’ “I understand. I’ll just be there to be the barrier between her and Jeremy. I don’t need Jeremy exploding at her if she triggers him.” ‘I understood, but I wanted an answer.’ “Dad…did you know that Jenny liked me? Did you ever suspect it?” We were pulling off the highway. We were maybe fifteen minutes from LAX. ‘Big question to ask in fifteen minutes, idiot.’

“Yeah.”

‘Yeah?’ “Yeah, what? Yeah she likes me? Yeah you suspected it? What!?!”

“I knew she liked you,” Dad’s body seemed to slump. “I told her not to pursue her feelings. It was that day I drove her home. You offered to do the dishes and I took the chance to talk to her.”

Shock. Disappointment. Anger. Everything I thought I would never feel for my old man came rushing forward. “HOW COULD…”

“Let me finish,” Dad pulled into the parking garage across from our terminal.

I glanced at the clock and we had arrived about thirty minutes early. “Talk.”

-Sophmore Year (Before Qualyfing Champs)-

“Thanks for the ride Mr. Matthews. I would have asked George for a ride, but he seemed quite determined to finish those dishes,” Jenny chuckled as she buckled her seat belt.

“No problem at all, Jenny,” Dad too buckled up and started towards her house. ‘How do I bring this up?’ Dad glanced at Jenny who was smiling while looking out the window.

“Jenny?”

“Yes,” Jenny’s head turned back, her expression was innocent.

“Do you have feelings for my son?” ‘Point blank is always the best option,’ Dad thought to himself.

…”I…uh…” Jenny’s face went flush, her complextion almost mimicked her hair color. “I…”

“Don’t worry. This is not an unhappy father. Whatever your answer you will always be my daughter in my heart,” was the truth.

Jenny turned back to the window, “I do. I…I love George.”

“Love!?! I asked if you liked my son, not if you loved him,” Dad exclaimed suddeny making Jenny jump out of her skin. “Sorry. But I think you are a little too young to know if you love someone.”

“I…I…” Jenny started to tear up, “I thought you would be happy?”

‘Great.’ “I am happy. Over the moon to be exact, but I am also conflicted,” Dad pulled into her driveway. “Wait a moment Jenny,” stopping Jenny from exiting the truck. “I am happy you like George. I hope your feelings can continue in the future, but also after this request. Know that it is a favor from a loving father,” I looked at Jenny who seemed nervous about my request.

“Favor?” She inquired but I stopped her.

“I need you… to keep your feelings… to yourself,” the last words stung Dad as he said them. ‘How could I ask such a thing. Of a girl I saw as my own daughter.’

Jenny was shocked. Stunned. She didn’t answer. Didn’t move. She just stared at me, mouth gaped open, in shock. “Keep it to myself,” she was confused. “How is that even possible?…”

“George’s life is at a critcal stage right now. He has poured everything into his swimming. He has changed drastically after his mom’s and I’s divorce. He seems to be hiding his pain from that by becoming an emotionless zombie. I know you have seen it,” Dad dug some tissues out of his door, because tears were starting to stream down her face.

Jenny accepted the tissues and wiped away her stained cheeks.

All the color was gone in her face; Dad could feel her defeat. “I just want my son to thrive in his goals. His dreams. I…I’m sorry for interferring in your feelings.” I…‘I don’t know how to explain how I felt in that moment.’

“I understand,” Jenny cleared her throat and whispered out those words. “I want him to thrive as well…” Jenny wiped away her last tear. “If that means I need to just be a friend to him and motivate him to his goals…I can do that,” Jenny faced Dad once again, the color and radiance began to glisten from her. “My feelings won’t falter. I will be your daughter at some point in the future; just you wait,” Jenny giggled as she gathered up her belongings and quickly exited the truck.

“I’ll be looking forward to that day, Jenny,” Dad yelled from his window. Jenny turned and waved before she entered her house. ‘I pray to God, that her feelings will stay strong. God, watch over her.’

…