Tag Archives: Humor

Life Of Two Best Friends: High School CHPT 39

Life Of Two Best Friends: High School CHPT 38

CHAPTER 39

Practice was nothing. We got in and swam for about thirty minutes, and then coach stopped us. I was not complaining.

“Everyone, I hope to see you at the Matthews’ house for our annual carbo-load. I already discussed it with George’s father and he will have it all ready for us,” Coach yelled at us in the pool. “So get out, head home to change, grab your parents, and maybe grab something to drink. I don’t remember if I told Adam to get drinks,” Coach turned to me.

“This is all news to me; but yeah, maybe bring your own beverge,” I yelled over my shoulder as I climbed out of the pool. “We good to go, Coach?”

“Yeah. Get out of here. See you all at the Matthews’ by four-thirty,” Coach walked off.

“You heard Coach. Get out,” I wait as all my thrilled teammates hurry to the locker rooms.

Walking in the front door, I stop suddenly…the house looked like Party City exploded. I wandered through the party decorations looking for the culprit. There he was panickily running back and forth in the kitchen. ‘My poor dad.’ Instead of interrupting the “chicken with no head”, I decided to clean and set up the living room.

The living room was done; it was not too bad now. I did not use all the decorations that Dad had chosen. Some of them were questionable; meaning too young, not too old. As I set up, I kept an eye on the panicked one; he was somewhat better now. It was about four o’clock and I was setting up my final folding chair. ‘Wow. seventy chairs later and I am finished.’

“Son. When did you get here? You set up the living room,” Dad had come up behind me!

Turning I saw one happy Dad. I thought he might cry. “Of course. You looked like you might explode when I got home, so I decided to help you out. Is it to your liking?”

“What happed to the baby farm animals. I thought Lily would enjoy those,” Dad said as he scanned the room.

“That makes sense. I was totally confused why you got baby animals for a bunch of teenager guys. Lily will definitely like the farm animals. I’ll go get them,” before Dad could stop me I was off to the guest room to gather the farm animals. ‘Dad did choose something that Lily will probably take home with her. Sorry Coach.’ I hung them up around the designated kid area. “Good?”

“Good. Do you think you help me a bit more. I just need some help dicing some vegetables,” Dad said probably dreading having to go back to the kitchen.

“No problem Dad. While we work though, I want to hear about your date?” Shoving my Dad’s body back into the kitchen. ‘Gosh. I understand why he didn’t want to come back, the kitchen had also exploded.‘ “Wow, Dad…you really did a number in here. Hopefully whoever you end up with is a wizard in the kitchen.”

Dad just chuckled and move me in front of a cutting board; my new home for the next few minutes.

“I definitely agree with your thought of finding someone who does not know me. The woman last night was too giggly and only asked me about my fame and accomplishments. I was done within the first five minutes,” Dad said as he arranged the sandwiches on a platter.

“That sucks Dad. You will find someone. But dating without them knowing YOU will be difficult. Maybe you should look into online dating. You could just upload a profile without a photo. The woman would get a big surprise once she found out who you were though,” I chuckle, while turning to look at Dad. He was doing the sandwiches; I don’t think he heard a word I said. “What are you doing? It looks like you are murdering the sandwiches.” I walked over and looked over his shoulder, ‘He was, as I expected, murdering the food.’

“I was trying to make it look elegant. Do you not see it?”

“It looks more like an elephant ran through the food,” I ducked from the smack; reflexes… because I know my dad.

“Go get ready for the people coming. They should be here…” Ding Dong! “as I said, they have arrived. I’ll attempt to make it less like an elephant mess and more like an elegant mess.”

Dad practically threw me out of the kitchen. “No appreciation for honesty. I’ll go. I’ll go,” I laughed with my hands up, as I went to answer the door.

…Beep…beep………

Blarrrgggghhhhh!

Aaaaaahhhhhhh!

Wwwwhhhyyyy!

Bblllaaaaaaaaaa!

Aaaagguuhhhh!

Blaaahhh….

Mama’s brain…

Mama no more…

You are all probably thinking… “what just happened…???”

Don’t worry. I should be fine. Hopefully…

I went to mom’s group, left baby at home with dad, and then returned to a sweet baby.

But around 3pm…she switched into her chaotic terrible two disaster.

The poem above, I actually don’t know if it even counts…but it was the best my brain can manage.

Imagine everything going completely wrong in your entire life, while adding a screaming angry two year old. Then roll of of it into a single day, and you will achieve the second half of my day yesterday.

…I am happy it is currently bed time. Because that means I will soon have some alone, peace and quiet time! 😳

Enjoy your quiet time. Because once kids come into the mix you will miss it terribly. Don’t get me wrong I love her dearly, it’s just sometimes she pushes my buttons.

At least I’ve been told, that once they reach 5 years old that life changes for the parent…so meaning, I have 2-3 years of utter chaos to go….

Silver lining?? Anyone…anyone…

Digital Art by emily2jane
05-04-21

Journey With Cookbooks #13

Mwahahahaha!

Well a new recipe.

I have to admit. It is difficult to stay within just three cookbooks. There are only so many ground beef recipes…and we have a lot of ground beefs to go. So I turned to google again.

Looks easy. It says it takes a total 20min to make. 😎

So I guess I renounce my statement of number of cookbooks. But I will be continuing to share my cooking stories. Let’s begin.

Lots of chopped green onions. These are also from my indoor plant. So they are fresh!!
Beef…

The longest part was defrosting the beef. I always forget hat it takes almost 30min to defrost.

Easy. Took the beef. Drain the fat, set aside.

Next I was to add all the other ingredients and let simmer. But I forgot to take a picture. But it was garlic, soy sauce, ginger powder, beef broth, various spices, and a whole cup of brown sugar…😳 but I realized why that much sugar later on…

Yummy! It smells delicious!

The next step was to add watered cornstarch. I don’t use cornstarch. For no other reason than I never have any and I always forget to buy some. So instead you double the amount and use flour.

It will help thicken the beef mixture. The only difference between flour and cornstarch in sauces is cornstarch stirs in clear; while flour might be cloudy.
Also…my tunes…

I’ve decided to listen through my iTunes music….it’s all the music I bought when I was a teenager…so most of it will probably be weird now…but maybe a few gems. Maybe…

As the meat is simmering for 8min you should also be cooking the noddles. It even suggested the spaghetti noodles. It was not a random decision. 🤓

The brown sugar is to glaze the noodles…🤔 ahhhh!

Hopefully it is good. It smells devine!

Top with the garnish…

Finished!!

….Wow! It is delicious. Even the hubby said he thinks this is his new favorite ground beef noodle recipe. Mine too. I wish I could post the video of Elizabeth eating it….it is definitely her favorite too!

So…

Look Like Picture: Maybe an 8. Just because it looks like they used a different option on the noodles. The more authentic version. We might have to get some next time.

Taste: 10! 100% 10!!

Easiness: 10! Another put it all together and then enjoy! I sent this recipe to my family. It is definitely a dish my brothers and nephews would love.

Also…

Cookies

The hubby made his chocolate chip cookies earlier so we already have dessert. It’s the normal nestle cookie recipe but somehow his cookies always come out amazing. One recipe I will not make; the hubby will always be in charge of chocolate chip cookies. And this time around he tried something new…

Fancy butter.

Nick’s friend gave us some fancy butter…if you love chocolate chip cookies, try making it with this butter….you will never be able to eat other cookies.

I’m usually good about not eating too many cookies… these ones I had 8 after dinner. I gained back all the weight I worked so hard to lose… 😩

Enjoy your night. I wish it to be filled with delicious food! But if it is filled with cookies…be strong…don’t eat too many! 🤣

Journey With Cookbooks #12

So I choose a meat first. I decided on beef…but for some reason I was having trouble finding a simple ground beef recipe that we haven’t had yet in the cookbooks…

Nothing…maybe it was because I was uninspired but I found nothing…
So I ventured into a few more…

Nothing…well that’s not completely true. I found a few in the casserole cookbook but none were sounding appetizing.

So I opted to one of my previous simple recipes…

It is a google recipe that I’ve edited, typed up, and printed into my goggle inspired cookbook.

So it says Korean…but since I didn’t have the right ingredients, when I first made it, I kind of Americanized it….so I apologize to the Koreans or foodies in the world that may cringe at some of my changes. Sorry. 😓

So first things first…defrost the beef…

It would take hours if I let it sit alone…so hot water, meet meat…

This is from the cow we bought…the meat doesn’t truly taste different to me, but when I cook it, it has a nice smell to it.

Rice maker…!

Funny story about our rice cooker. My brother didn’t end up wanting this rice cooker when he went back for his second year of college…so I took it. 🤓 And it still lives!! It’s about 4 years old. When it eventually dies I will be very sad…😞

Anyways back on topic. Rice is cooking!!

The sauce and meat cooking pan is prepared…
A little bit of olive oil and start cooking the meat. Just until no longer pink.

Can you guess what I decided to do while I waited for the meat to cook?

Get the dishes prepared for after dinner…🥸

It is not my blog unless doing dishes is mentioned at some point…

I decided to add my always green bean recipe. It’s not really a recipe…

You know when you cook something so often that you no longer measure…that would be my green beans. Some butter, green beans, some salt, a little pepper, a lite sprinkle of garlic powder…and a five finger pinch of brown sugar. Mix it up and let it simmer until you are done with everything else…

Drain off the fat…
I changed my mind about the sauce…I wiped out the bit of fat at the bottom of the pan and added the sauce.

Yeah it means one more dish…but to be honest it was the same pot I used to boil Elizabeth’s noddles for Mac n cheese…so it was already used. Another confession…I just wiped it with a paper towel after lunch…But all it had was a couple stuck noodles. 🤪

Stir the meat. Add the flavor!!

Now I’m hungry. I wasn’t really hungry when I started. But now I’m a HUNGRY THING!!

The rice is done.

We get a sushi rice. It’s the best! Costco!!

The garnish…🤩

Green onions just add that extra yum! to certain foods. I usually add them to anything hat sounds remotely good.

My food!

I’ve been trying to be better at my rice consumption. I now measure out my rice. It also makes the plate look pretty and professional…but honestly it’s just for measuring purposes.

See this was a normal cooking process before I got the cookbooks. My google inspired cookbook is huge. I gave my siblings a copy for Christmas this last year.

Even though it’s a bit simple it was delicious!!

I guess I’ll rate them since this is a recipe after all…

Looks Like Picture: 10! I do remember the picture. It always looks the same.

Taste: 10! I always love this meal. It’s a little sweet, spicy, and salty. Everything you usually crave rolled into one recipe. In case you try it…if you do not like spicy don’t add the red pepper flakes. Or maybe just half… also my hubby wanted seconds but again I said no. Just because I knew ice cream was in the near future…

Easiness: 10! It’s pretty much an add everything together and wait. Also since I use a rice cooker it makes this meal extremely easy!

Also to give you an idea of amount of beef mixture it makes… I had about a small heaped 1/2 cup. The hubby…3/4 cup?? I think. And there probably 1 cup leftover. So for two people, it’s a one dinner and one lunch kind of meal.

Hopefully this recipe made you hungry. Usually I won’t post the recipe but since this one is a recipe I tweaked to work fo me I shared it.

Have a great dinner tonight!!

Is today the day?

Ready?

Yes! Here I sit,

And wait…

Splash! Something?…

Nope.

Nothing.

I see them…

Teasing me.

Splashing around,

Avoiding their fate…

I’m done.

Let’s leave.

Again not today…

Fishing must not be for me.

Today’s poem is inspired by my hubby. He has been trying to get some fish…but I think the fish can feel his wanting and are just trying to push him past his breaking point. He will probably give up for now, but just until his dad arrives this coming Friday. They are planning on fishing for the weekend.

We joke about the possibility of me trying fishing…and I would probably catch one within the first 15min. I really want to try and see if that truly does happen. 🤓 I will admit… I will be pretty happy if I can!! Mwahahahaha!

But I am hoping the hubby can have patience when he goes fishing with his dad… he said he almost threw the pole in the river…haha 😅 I suggested we get him a pair of those waterproof overall fishing pants; so that he can just walk out into the river with a net and try to catch a fish that way…

He was not impressed with my idea… I thought is was an awesome idea. Haha 😆

I wish you patience in whatever hobby you are trying out, that might not be going as planned. 👍

Digital Art by emily2jane
4-25-21

Life As A Mama #38

These days do happen, but rarely…
Baby’s breakfast is prepared and looking yummy!!
Making our breakfasted has become just a routine…I can be done in less than 10min now. 😎 I decided to eat my peanut butter honey toast in the kitchen standing up.
As I finished my last bite…Elizabeth had finished hers…WOW!
She also…put her dishes in the sink and counter when she was done…
I was surprised but also quite proud…
Now this I think is the biggest surprise for me…!
Like always doing the dishes after dinner. When a sudden, “Mama!” told me it must be that time.
Potty time!! When she was finally done going potty and ready to go back into the kitchen…I saw this…😳
The hubby…was doing…the dishes…🤯
Almost exactly the face I had after I saw this…I took a picture when it happened. Just because I knew this would be great comic content.
Beware people…beware…
Original by emily2jane
4-25-21

Elizabeth now clears her dishes and puts them in the dishwasher. 🥰 It’s so cute!! Also whenever we are watching a movie while eating out ice cream on the couch, she will take our bowls and spoons and put them in the sink. She takes care of mama! 😍

And I really shouldn’t be so shocked about the hubby doing the dishes…but it’s been almost four years since I saw that sight…

I guess… husbands in the world… if you want to confuse your wife do the dishes one night without saying anything… She, like me, will wonder if the world is ending.

Haha 😂 well enjoy your day!

Journey With Cookbooks #11

The chuck roast recipe…😎 and a surprise…!

Shredded Barbecue Beef…🤤
Four pounds of yummy!!

As I said in #10’s post that it had to marinate for 24hrs.

Spices ready!!
Meat prepared!! See you tomorrow morning!
Oooooooooooo

So it’s not the most exciting process…and I also tweaked the recipe. The recipe called for using a barbecue to grill the meat in a foil container…I didn’t want to break the hubby’s grill while he was out so I made do with a crockpot. I looked up various crockpot chuck roast recipes and they all said similar: Low 8-10hrs. 😎

You can’t really see the progress, but it smells delicious!!

At this point we have about 3hrs to go…

Okay so at this point we have eaten lunch and I have been skimming through this new cookbook and come upon…churros…😳

Churros it is!!

Who can skip the churros recipe…

The batter did not seem correct but I just went with it expecting it to fail…
I didn’t have the correct nozzle so I just made them like this…
Well I got creative with the shapes as the rounds went on, but you see that empty plate…that means they are being eaten as I finish them. 😎

They might have looked strange but they were yummy!!

The cinnamon roll shaped ones came out the best!

Okay back to the roast. It is almost ready!!

It just fell off the bone…actually I thought I was going to be able to pick it up by the bone and the bone just slipped out. 😎

I didn’t realize the recipe was going to have me make a BBQ sauce, but I am happy it did. Costco has not been selling our favorite BBQ sauce, so we’ve been pretty limited.

Made with some of the juices and other varied ingredients, I followed the recipe!

Well I kind of followed it. When I was reading the ingredients my brain change cider to white. So I added 1/2 cup of white vinegar. I realized after I pour it in, and decided to try and ladle some out. I then added about 1/4 cup of cider vinegar. Nobody in my household will know! 😎

Hopefully I am making you hungry!!

Removing the fat this is what remains!! Enough for a few dinners!!

I had to taste it at this point…Yum!

Add some sauce…and…
Hubby’s food.
My food.

I know I always say be healthy but we do occasionally eat other veggies besides salad, I’ve just been too lazy.

So…this recipe is a must for anyone out there that loves meat and barbecue…A MUST!

Look Like Photo: Chuck Roast: Maybe an 8. Since I didn’t smoke/ grill the meat it didn’t take on as much color….I think. I’m not really sure; I’m still new at cooking big chunks of meat.

Churros: 0…it did not in the slightest look like the photo…😒

Taste: Chuck Roast: 10!!!!!!!!!!! I would say 100! But it is out of 10 so 10!!!!!!! The hubby would have had seconds but I said no.

Churros: I would give a 9! It tasted amazing but I think I will follow a different recipe. The dough seemed more like funnel cake batter…that probably would have worked better.

Easiness: 10! Because it was cooked in a crockpot it was super easy!! I think the churros were harder; giving churros a 7.

So overall I had another busy day! Hopefully this drive to cook continues…I love food! I have been exercising…I exercise to eat food!! Mwahahahaha! 😎

Husbands in the world…if you want some new varieties give your wife a cookbook. But make sure she knows you aren’t saying her food is awful. So maybe give her some flowers too!

Enjoy!

Life As A Mama #37

Today was a nice day, but filled with sadness…😅

Da Da Dunnnnnnn!
She was being such a sweet sweet this morning that I wanted a picture of her…
I guess it was too much to ask…I preceded to copy her; I sent that picture to my family.
Got her ready for church and she looked so cute! Will she smile for grandma…
Yes. Yes she will. Mama, no. Grandma, yes.
Figures….
Lunchtime!!
One of the foods that makes her a happy baby…applesauce. Meaning of life for her…
Now my turn!
I did everything for her first as always. Made her Mac n cheese, gave her applesauce, milk. So I turned my back a second and…
Her applesauce is untouched…whereas my apples have been munched upon…
She ate all the good parts and left me the peel part. She also gave me back all the bites that were not to her liking. 😒
Yes another black rain cloud. It was a rain cloud type of moment.

I still ate my “apple” I’ve gotten used to it. I guess the love of apples has been passed down to Elizabeth. I’ve always loved apples.

Random memory: In the first Harry Potter movie, the scene with the Halloween feast…you see all the meat, candy, desserts, etc. However for me, the first time I saw the movie I was with my sister and I yelled, “APPLES!!” when a basket of them came on screen. The love of apples is good. Haha 😂

Original by emily2jane
4-18-21

It was not a bad day. It was actually a very nice Sunday. I am just feeling some heart break for my apple.

Also, you should know Elizabeth continued, and ate all of her applesauce, and asked for seconds…

Enjoy your Monday. Have an apple 🍎😊

Journey With Cookbooks #10

So I lied when I said I would be starting the other Ree Drummond cookbook. I needed to find a recipe for 4lbs of chuck roast…so I dove into this one instead!!

I thought a country styled cookbook would have plenty of meat recipes…I was correct!

However this blog post is not about the chuck roast. It had to marinate for 24hrs, so I decided to make chicken nuggets from the same cookbook.

Frying in peanut oil again!

You should know. After getting the chuck roast ready I decided upon a crazy idea…I have been in the kitchen since 11:45am…it is currently 4:40pm. I cleaned the refrigerator…

So clean!!! 😍

I thought I would have a break to sit down after my madness of cleaning…nope. Dinner here I come!

All my ingredients are ready.

I forgot I needed to defrost the chicken; so that I could put it in the brine concoction. It had to sit in the fridge for 30min….

Sitting for the short 30min…🤤
Breading of the chicken!!

It was actually an easy process. I was quite surprised how easy. It was a nice change for starting a new cookbook.

It’s coming along!!
Round 2 of breading…Well…

When the recipe tells you to cut even pieces it’s actually for a reason. Because then the piece cook the same amount of time. I had to cook the big pieces together, and cook them a little longer.

But it still looks delicious!!
Done!

Since I was using a pot and not a dutch oven I had to do a few more rounds. Try four more rounds…

The fries were from another dinner.

Keeping it healthy…we had a salad!

Again this recipe does not seem so exciting but it actually was! I fried chicken and it came out done and still moist…I have become a master at frying…at least in my household!

The hubby and Elizabeth both said yum yum when I served them.

The fries, sadly, did not survive to this dinner, they were hard and were kind of chewy, but Elizabeth still ate them all off her plate…😳

Look Like Photo: 10! I think because I did not use the vegetable oil it looks a bit different in color but overall…10!! 😎

Taste: Hubby 10! Elizabeth 10! Me 10! So delicious. Will definitely be making this again. And might use the temp, time, and breading for other various chicken recipes!!

Easiness: I give it a solid 9. One point off of perfect because I had to do several extra rounds. But the rounds were only 3-4min long. So we are talking an extra 12-16min. That’s why I give it a 9!!

My next cooking post will be about the chuck roast recipe!! It was delicious as well!!

Ooooooooooooo 😯 Big hunk of yes please!!!