“Back off! Seriously back off!” I backed up towards….a window! ‘Great, I’m on the second floor. ‘ “BACK OFF!” I couldn’t see it anymore, but I could feel its presence. I felt around myself; looking for anything to defend myself. Anything. “Anything.” My foot slipped on something behind me. I knew that tonight was over. It felt like I watched my body fall into the abyss. Whack! My head made contact and then darkness.
…
‘Oh my head. Pain. Headache. PAIN!’ Then remembering what had happened last night I flashed my eyes open, but instantly regretted that action. Light flooded me. Everything was white. Instead of suffering in the complete emulousness I closed my eyes and attempted to hone in on my other senses. I heard nothing except my heart pounding. At least I knew I was alive. My nose worked, but I wish it didn’t. Whatever the smell was, it must have died. Could I move? I could. My body felt lifeless. My arms lifted easily; I could also wiggle my toes. ‘Okay. Let’s try this again.’ I opened my eyes once again. Light engulfed me. I slowly sat up, and there I sat in a glowing white space. The light bounced around. ‘Was this really where I was last night?’ I was still in a corner, but there was no window. I was still in my clothes from last night. I had the stamp on my wrist from the club last night. But how should I put this…my body was shimmering. Glimmering? Glistening? Whichever it was, it didn’t seem normal.
“Do you understand what is happening?”
‘Where did that voice come from?’ I jumped into a squatted position and tucked myself farther into the corner. “Who said that?” Silence. “Where are you?” Nothing. “Show yourself!?!” ‘Did I really want it to show itself. Was it the same person from last night?’ But if it wanted to fight, I was not going to back down. I threw my hands up into a fighting stance.
“No need for that. Alexandra relax yourself. I’m here to help you transition.” Again just a voice.
“If you are here to help, then show yourself!” ‘Transition?’ “What do you mean transition?”
A blazing being became more focused; they seemed to ooze from the white walls around me. “I’m here to help you transition. If you have any things you wish to bring to a close before your own close, I will help you find closure. Can you think of anything?”
‘Why do they keep saying transition? Bring to a close? My own close? Closure?’ “What are you talking about. I’m fine. I’m moving. I don’t need your help. I’m going back home.” I stood and tried to walk out of the endless room, but the blazing being stopped me. Seriously, my body stopped when the being’s glow moved in my way. “MOVE!”
“Alexandra. You need to keep your composure. I will explain everything in a moment. Can you keep calm?”
I wanted to strangle the glowing being, but sure I can be composed. Only for a moment. “Fine. Sure, Whatever.” I waited…
Suddenly the room that was once bright was full of darkness. I couldn’t see anything. But slowly my eyes accustomed themselves to the darkness. It was the room. It was filthy here. I didn’t notice last night but the floor was shrouded with trash. The wallpaper was torn and jagged. The only reason I could see anything at all, was because the blazing being was still besides me. Its glow was still vibrant amongst the darkness. I saw the window. It had bars on the outside; good thing I didn’t try that last night. I walked towards the window, but then I stumbled. ‘What was that? I pushed myself up, but it was not the floor that my hand pushed on…what am I touching?’ I jumped back! I know I touched something strange. It didn’t stay firm with my hand; it moved beneath me. “Wh…what was that? Show me.”
The being glided to the mass I was next to, until it was hovering next to the….body.
There was a body next to me. A lifeless body. ‘A BODY!’ I felt sick. I had used this body to brace myself. I felt disgusting. ‘Wait. A body.’ I crawled over to the body and checked their pulse. Maybe there was a chance they could be saved. Nothing. I took up the position to begin chest compressions…
“No need for that. Sadly this young woman is gone from this world.”
I got an eerie feeling. ‘Woman? No…’ I didn’t want to but I couldn’t look away. She had a pink top on like me. ‘Just a coincidence.’ She wore a blue jean skirt. ‘Normal for girls to have the same sense in fashion.’ The tiger stamp was also on her wrist. ‘Other people go to clubs. That’s normal.’ But…her face. Her face was my face. ‘My face. This was me. I was lifeless here in the dark alone.’ “How? Why? How?”
“Alexandra,” the glowing being came closer, “I need you to calm yourself.”
I couldn’t I was all sorts of feelings. Disbelief, anger, sadness, chills, confusion, depression. But that didn’t change anything. I needed to calm myself. ‘Just breathe Alex, breathe.’ But my body was not listening. It was shaking, and I don’t think it was going to stop.
“Alexandra. Alex….”
Suddenly arms wrapped me. Somebody was holding me. My body was relaxing. I wanted to look and see who was holding me, but instead I just hugged them harder. I wanted to just stay like this; because then that meant I didn’t have to deal with the problem at hand. But this smell…I knew this smell. It was coming from the person holding me. Looking up, there stood… Jeremiah!?! ‘WHAT!?! Jeremiah. My best friend who passed two years ago. How?’ I pushed him off of me and away. “Who are you?”
“It’s only been two years and you have forgotten me already, Alex?” Jeremiah smiled.
‘That grin. That was the grin that I have missed. How was it him? How was he here?’ Oh, how I have missed him. “Of course I remember you, Jeremiah. I miss you everyday,” my under control body was beginning to tremble again. Tears were forming. “Why are you here now? Where is here? Why did you have to leave me when I needed you most. Why..?” The floodgates opened.
Again Jeremiah hugged the sobbing Alex before him. “Oh, Alex. I’m sorry. It wasn’t my decision to leave either. If I could have stayed, I would have stay with you always. But God had a different plan. Now that I’m thinking about it; I probably needed to be here for you when you needed to transition. He knew that you would have no one. So for once I’m glad that I left this world two years ago. Even though watching you these last two years has been rough. I’ve tried to keep you safe. But some of your decisions have been terrible. Like the one last night. Why did you decide to go off with that scum? You knew that he was bad; why would you do that to yourself?”
I was listening, between my sobs, but I didn’t want to. I just wanted comfort, but all I was getting was a lesson. I knew that guy was bad news. I had planned to expose him, but instead I was cornered. I was killed. ‘Why me?’
“Alex. I’m sorry. Please stop crying. Please,” Jeremiah decided to let the lesson go. The results of her actions was not going to change. “Shhhhh…”
I’ve missed Jeremiah, so much. Life has been so empty without him. I’ve been just going through the motions. Jeremiah had been my only family left. Everyone else had already passed away when I was little. But for these last two years I’ve been reckless. I guess I’ve been trying to leave; ironic. Now that I’ve left; I desperately want to go back.
There are so many things that I haven’t done. Love, kids, life. Looking back I don’t think I would have actually achieved those things. Love: you have to first love yourself; and I don’t think I hated myself, but I was not happy. Kids: you need love first; maybe I should have adopted. I should have adopted! I could have given a different child a home and family. How I wish that could have been me. Life…my life was over. I wonder if I was able to continue, if I could have changed my life path. Now that I know what I know now, I would have tried.
“Jeremiah. What happens now?” Instead of looking at what could have been; I should just start fresh now.
Jeremiah still held Alex close. “Now you transition. God has given you the chance to give yourself closure or to give your chance to another person alive today. After that we go on. You live once again; just in a new way. A better way.” Jeremiah pulled away from Alex, “You ready?”
‘Was I ready? What else could I do?’ “I’m ready. And I know just what I want to do.”
…Down On Earth…
“Sister Mary? Do you know an Alexandra Mitchell?”
“No. I don’t believe I do,” Sister Lucy came over to look at the card. “Whomever she is, she is a God send. Look at this donation. With this, we can help so many of our kids.”
Sister Mary looked out at the kids running around outside, “You have a special guardian angel watching over you all. She has given you a chance at a better life. Bless you, Miss Alexandra.”
The End
emily2jane 